The Christmas party season is upon us.
Here are my Top Ten Christmas Party Tips, some of which may help you survive yours.
If you already had your Christmas party, and died... then I'm sorry.
1. Planning on wearing fancy dress? Then this is the guy to beat. R/GA Christmas party, 2012, NYC.
2. Don't follow the Christmas bash tips of Melbourne agency BGM, listed here, unless you want your party to be utterly lame. They include: "PC rules still apply – Politics, sex, toilet humour, religion, women, races are off limits." (Women are off limits?) And "Dress appropriately and make an impression for the right reasons. Jedi outfit to remain at home." Why does the Jedi outfit have to remain at home, BGM? Perhaps because the highlight of their 2009 bash was "a guy with a mullet wig."
3. What happens when you give every agency in the world, the same brief? This. If you should happen to get the brief, my tip is to be extremely rude. Like this.
4. Do you work at 2Day FM, the pranking radio station? You are off the hook. Your Christmas party this year has been cancelled.
5. Fun card, though I don't like the sexist way that it's the men exchanging the women. I guess they're satirising the fact that ad execs were all men in those days.
6. Prepare to be asked “What are you doing for Christmas?” by anybody you
happen to stand near for long enough. Resist the temptation to tell them
you’ll be trying to avoid meaningless conversations.
7. If you cop off with someone, everyone will know about it the next day. That's right. Everyone.
8. If you start ranting about a co-worker, be aware that this person will be standing directly behind you.
9. It's normally better to throw up in a bin than a toilet.
10. Don't corner your boss and tell him: "What this company needs to start doing differently is..." He will have come wearing a chest protector. And maybe earplugs.